Open Mic Night
by HP.Surfer16
Summary: Zack's world ended when she left two years ago. Long nights on the roof top thinking of her, drove him to write his feelings down, into songs. An Open Mic Night may be his opportunity to rid himself of the pain. Unless she shows up to hear him.
1. Roof Top Refuge

In the Tipton lobby everything was peaceful and quiet…. Almost! Zack, Cody, and their new friend Oakley made their way inside the lobby; they had been skateboarding. Oakley was giving Zack props on his new trick he had landed, when Cody made a startling outburst.

- "Look, the Tipton's hosting an 'Open Mic Night,' for all guests tommorow!' Cody yelled.

- "So…?" Zack asked making his way over to Cody, who was standing in front on a large sign in the middle of the lobby.

- "So, maybe this is your chance to play that new song you've been writing!" Cody yelled too loudly.

- "You didn't tell me you were writing a song." their mom, Carrie announced, walking up to them.

- "Must have slipped my mind." Zack said with annoyance to his brother.

- "Hey, Ms. Martin." Oakley said politely.

Oakley was polite by nature, it's what he did. That is why he was such good friends with Cody, they were both sensitive and caring. The reason he was good friends with Zack was because they both loved video games, junk food, and skateboarding. So you could say he was a mix between the two twins. Kind of like a triplet, though he was 6 foot tall and had dark brown hair, and they each had blonde hair and stood at 5'9.

- "Hey, Oakley. Are you staying over tonight?" she asked with a bright smile.

- "Yes, ma'am if that was alright with you." he said politely once again.

- "Sure Oakley, you're always welcome." she said before walking away.

- "Dude, you have to quit being so polite. You're going to turn into a complete pushover like Cody!" Zack told his friend seriously.

- "Shut up, Zack!" Cody spat at him.

- "Look, Cody…face it you're a pushover, and that's okay." Zack said in a tone to comfort, as he put his hand on his brother's shoulder.

- "Well at least I'm not a coward! You wont even sing at 'Open Mic Night'!" Cody yelled at Zack.

- "Okay guys, lets just take this somewhere else, people are staring." Oakley chimed in.

Both boys blew their anger out in deep breaths. Together all three boys made their way up to the suite on the 23rd floor, that was so familiar. "I cant believe we've been here for five years. We usually don't stay anywhere for too long." Cody said as he looked around the suite. Zack nodded in agreement, they obviously forgot their fight for the time. Oakley pounded his way to the couch, sat down, put his feet on the table, and turned on the TV. "Just what I was thinking!" Zack said as he joined his and Cody's friend.

"Well, I'm going to do my homework." Cody said before going to the twins' bedroom. "Isn't it Saturday?" Oakley asked Zack, who rolled his eyes in reply. They sat their, silent, until Oakley got up enough courage to ask what he had been wanting to ask, "So…Zack. Why wont you sing your song at the 'Open Mic Night' tomorrow?" Zack looked at his friend and simply shrugged.

-"Dude, I read it. It sounds like it would be good, as far as love songs go." Oakley said.

- "Yeah, I know. It's the best one I've written, but I cant do it. It's about someone." Zack replied.

- "Who?"

- "You remember Maddie?"

- "The candy counter girl?"

- "Yeah. That's who."

- "Well, isn't she in college? Most likely she wont be coming to the Mic night."

- "You're probably right, but it's hard."

- "Zack?"

- "Yeah?"

- "Is she the reason you haven't dated anyone this year?"

- "Uh…I've dated." he replied hesitantly.

- "No you haven't."

- "Fine! No I haven't. And I don't know what the reason is. I guess none of them are…"

- "Like Maddie?" Oakley finished for him.

Zack nodded, and they watched the rest of the movie. That was clearly enough guy talk for tonight. Anymore talking about his feelings and Zack was going to throw up. They decided to call it a night, so they retreated into Zack and Cody's bedroom and all piled on the floor with their sleeping bags. Though, Zack was clearly not getting any sleep. Instead he gathered his guitar, pen, and paper, and went to the roof to play.

It wasn't just because of the "Open Mic Night," no most nights were usually like this, at least when he started to think about Maddie. He would always find refuge on the roof, with his guitar in tow. Which is probably why his song was so good, he worked on it most nights, after all.

He strummed on his guitar a few times, and wrote a little extra on his song, before going back to bed. He snuck in, which wasn't hard to do anymore. His mother could sleep through an earthquake, as long as she dreamt about George Clooney. Zack slipped into his room and laid in his sleeping bag until his eyes fluttered closed, and he fell into a dreamful sleep.

**(A/N) I decided to add this because I already had this written...well I have more written I just want to space it all out. My shoulder is dislocated, which if you read On A Cruise you'd know that...so my lack of updates is becoming a problem. I decided this would kinda make up for the lack of updates for that story...I dunno I try lol. Please Review...i dont know what you think if you dont tell me.**


	2. Facing Maddie and Singing Her Song

The next morning, the entire hotel was bustling with news about the open mic night. Sign ups were in the front of the lobby, and Zack hesitantly signed his name. He wanted his song heard, it was good after all. The only problem he had was singing his feelings in front of a room of strangers, but he guessed it would be better than singing it in front of Maddie.

He let out a deep breath and walked away from the sign up sheet before he could change his mind and erase it. He decided to go to the game room since Cody and Oakley went to the skate park with Bob and Tapeworm. On his way he bumped into a rather familiar blonde. "Maddie!" Zack gasped. He couldn't believe it.

"Hey Zack!" Maddie yelled before she pulled him into a hug. He looked down at her, due to his growth spurt, with wide eyes. "What are you doing here?" he asked, he was absolutely flabbergasted.

"Oh, Cody called me, he said you were performing tonight. I had to come see you." she replied. Just then Zack felt anger rising in him. Though, he hadn't told Cody what he told Oakley. _I am going to kill him! I didn't tell him not to tell her but he should have know. I mean how stupid can you be!_

He let out a deep breath and forced a smile as he told her he'd see her tonight. He walked to his room with fury. He thought he was going to throw up. Now his nightmare came true, he would have to perform his song in front of her. He could have sang something else, but nothing was as good as this one. And a part of him wanted her to hear it, a part of him wished she felt the same, too, but he knew she didn't.

He stayed there, in his empty hotel room until it was almost time for the show. His stomach was tied in a thousand knots, his palms were sweating, and he was absolutely a nervous wreck. He showered, tried to get ready, but he knew he wasn't ever going to be ready…not really. He threw on a baby blue t-shirt, some distressed jeans, and threw on a trucker hat. He was presentable, but not ready.

He grabbed his guitar and went down to the ballroom, where they were holding the "Open Mic Night." He walked into the room, and sat in the front, until his time came.

First up was, Mr. Moseby singing some country song, Zack had never heard before. The next ten were various guests, and out of them only two had "okay" voices. London came up and almost killed everyone. She sounded almost like a cat being drowned, or a hippo giving birth. Yeah, it was that bad.

Zack seemed to be the last one._ Great I'm closing the show. Just perfect._ He sat on the stool and propped his acoustic on his lap. He adjusted the microphone and spoke, "Hey guys. This is a song I've been working on for about five years. I wrote it for someone special back then, who is still very special to me. It's called 'You're always there'." He began strumming his guitar…

_You left yesterday_

_Now the aftermath…is here today_

_I gave you clues_

_Hell I screamed it from the roof_

_What I felt for you_

_And I swear I still do_

_No matter how you take it_

_I sure as hell cant shake it_

_I don't care _

_I have to share_

_Cause you're always on my mind_

_Damn! Look at the time_

_Homework is not done_

_Dinner is not ate_

_No time for fun_

_No time for hate_

_Cause you're always there_

_Tormenting me_

_With your brown eyes…and golden blonde hair_

_I go to the roof_

_To forget you_

_But here I am…writing this song_

_Why the hell is this so wrong?_

_My feelings for you!_

_So what your older_

_So what I'm younger_

_I tell them no regrets, because 'I told her'_

_Everyday_

_But your not here today_

_No matter how you take it_

_I just cant seem to shake it_

_I don't care_

_I have to share_

_Cause your always on my mind_

_Even when I don't have time…_

_During class_

_When I'm talking to a lass_

_When I'm eating_

_When I'm skating_

_When I'm broken_

_When I'm perfect_

_You arrive_

_Right on time_

_In my mind_

_And I don't care how far I drive_

_Cause there you are…again_

_Sometimes its good_

_Sometimes its great_

_But times like these_

_I want to concentrate_

_Away from you_

_Because it hurts so bad_

_That you left me_

_When all I wanted to do_

_Was love you…_

Zack finished to hear applause fill the room. He looked over to Maddie, apparently she knew exactly who is was about, because she looked shocked, to say the least. He leapt off stage and went straight out of the room. He walked over to the elevator, but elevators are slow. "Damn! I hate elevators!" he yelled under his breath.

"Zack wait!" Maddie yelled.

**(A/N) I know it is short, but I'll have the next chapter tomorrow. And "On a Cruise" WILL be updated tonight! I'm sorry about the waiting. I'm not going to make any more excuses, because I can type better with my shoulder and my tutor has slacked up on the amount of work she gives. But this stuff will be updated unless I get totally sidetracked. And this chapter definately isnt very good...next chapter is going to be less rushed and more discriptive...I swear. My writing is going to improve because I know I can do better than this.**

**So like expect an increase in updates soon. So please Review this poor update lol.**


	3. In It Again

"Zack wait!" Maddie yelled.

He didn't turn. He couldn't. He didn't want to hear what she thought of the song. He didn't want her feeling sorry for him.

"Mr. Martin?" another voice sounded from behind him.

He turned this time, curious to know who the voice belonged to. He turned and saw Maddie turned to a large man. The man was a good 6 feet tall, but weighed in the 300's. He was large, but carried himself nicely, in an Armani suit and his hair slicked back perfectly, no hair out of place.

"Yeah?" Zack answered. The man smiled and walked briskly towards him, outstretching a hand for Zack to shake.

"I'm Percy McFillan. I work for Boston Boy Records. Boy you have some major talent. A real Jesse McCartney meets Tyler Hilton edge. You have everything. The looks, the skill, the voice. Everything. We've been looking for young talent like that, and I think you may be what we're looking for." the man explained.

Zack was taken aback. A record company wanted him? Not just any record company either, no, this record company was quickly working its way to the top record company in the nation. He stared wide eyed at the man, occasionally looking over to see Maddie's head down to her feet. Did she know the man was coming?

"Did you know this man was in the audience?" Zack asked.

"Yeah. I've known how good you were since the talent show but Cody told me you were so much better. I know Percy's son, Evan, and I told him about you and he said that they had actually been looking for someone that fit your description. So me and Evan told Percy and we all three decided to come down here for Open Mic Night to hear you. I just didn't realize the song was about me…" She explained.

"Well, now you do." Zack said to her. He turned to Percy and continued, "Mr. McFillan, sir, I would love to join your company right now, and at this second…but it's a lot to take in right now, and I still have to talk with my mom about it."

Percy nodded. "Well, I'll be staying here for another couple of days…I know that is a short time, but I'm a very busy person. You're mother and I can talk about it anytime within those days…just tell her I'm staying in room 976." he finished before walking away from Zack and Maddie.

"So you and Evan." Zack said, waiting on another elevator. The last one left only a minute ago.

"How did you know?" she asked, moving beside him.

"I could tell. The way you said his name earlier. You said it like you would have said, 'I'm sorry, Zack.' it was an apology. The fact you looked everywhere but me. The fact that a record company snot wouldn't help someone's friend unless that someone was sleeping with them." Zack finished with a mixture of anger and sadness.

"That was un called for, Zack." Maddie said quietly. She was on the verge of tears. He turned to her.

"Was it?" he asked. "Because you come here after two years! That's two years of trying to get over you. You come here, with your boyfriend and boyfriend's father to help 'poor Zack' get a deal. Tell the truth Maddie, you didn't come here to help a friend…you came here to get me a deal so you wouldn't have to _deal _with _me_. Did you even listen to that song? Yeah maybe only some of it, but you didn't get the pain that went into writing it. The pain that it caused to think about you every day. The pain that knowing the only songs that were worth a damn…were about you. I cried every time I wrote a verse. You left with only a wave, but I still loved you. Now tell the truth Maddie. You wanted me to thank you for getting me a great deal…not to be a stupid heartbroken kid when he found out you were engaged!" he finished.

"Zack…"

"Yeah you'd have to be blind not to see the crater on your finger."

Ding! The elevator sounded. He sighed before stepping in. But he didn't get in the elevator alone. No. Maddie tore her way in the elevator and as soon as the doors closed she pressed the button to stop them.

"Maddie, press the damn button."

"Not until you hear me out." she started. She faced him with tears seeping through the corner of her eyes. She pointed her finger to him and pressed it to his chest, roughly and pushed him against the wall. "I regretted everyday that I didn't tell you bye. But I couldn't. You were the most special person to me in Boston and I couldn't tell you good bye. Yes, I'm engaged to Evan, but no I didn't get you this opportunity out of guilt or to make you less mad at me or less heartbroken. I came with them to tell you first about this engagement. I haven't even told my mother. I wanted to tell you first because I knew that it would hurt you. And I don't ever want to hurt you, but I knew this would. I had no idea that that song would be about me. Cody said it was suppose to be very good, so I told Evan it would be a good time to hear you play. Zack if you were older things would have been different. But you're not older. And now the age difference isn't that bad, but I'm with Evan now. I'm sorry. I still want to be your friend, cause you still are so special to me, Zack." she explained, and with each sentence more tears seemed to seep out.

"I don't know if I can be your friend. I cant be. It hurts to even look at you. You have to understand and respect that, because that's just how it is." he said before rushing over to press the button. At that moment, Maddie seemed to break down silently but surely as she shook violently, as tears flowed down her already tear-stained cheeks.

He got off at the 23rd floor and she at the 25th. Each going there separate ways. Zack ran straight to his room, threw his guitar down, and plopped to the bed. He felt as if his life had just ended. It took everything he had to not break down in that elevator, along with Maddie.

There friendship was over. Truly over. Tears burned the corners of his eyes as they tried to force their way out by stinging. He decided to let them flow. They ran down his cheeks, flowing all the way down and dripping off his chin.

The door opened and he heard his mother walk in. He quickly dried his tears and made his way out of the room to tell her about the offer. She thought it to be a great idea. Her being a musician herself. But more so she thought it a way for him to forget Maddie.

Maddie entered her suite to find Evan already waiting. She didn't even talk to him. She rushed passed and slammed the door to one of the bedrooms behind her. She fell onto her bed and let the tears flow once again. She loved Zack. More than a friend. Her time away enlightened that. Not the song. But now they weren't even friends. How could she had been so stupid, she thought.

She shook violently as tears stung her eyes and hiccups enveloped her. She moved her knees to her chest and hugged them tightly. Her mascara ran down her face, but she didn't care. She didn't even bother to fix it. All she could think about was that song. How ever much pain he felt, she knew she probably felt the same over the years.

The next day Carrie talked to Percy about his offer and everything seemed to be in order, and her and Zack signed a contract for a year. Zack's schedule over the next few weeks was crazy. Absolutely crazy. He had thirteen meetings, various recordings, two for each of his songs, and promotional shoots. It almost made him forget about Maddie…almost.

She was there in his songs. Now she was sitting outside the glass waiting, along with others, to hear another song. She hadn't been there for the other recordings, which was probably a good thing, because each was about her. But here she was. For the most personal song of all. The one he started when she left and finished after their incident in the elevator. This is when Zack knew…fate hated him.

"Alright guys, this is my latest one. I've been working on it for two years…it's the most emotional of the bunch. I hope you like it. It's called, 'In It Again'." He started strumming his guitar to the music. (A/N: I really wish you guys could ACTUALLY hear this song)

_You left me there_

_Standing with a stare_

_Only a wave goodbye_

_They ask me if I miss you…and I lie_

_I say no_

_I say I wanted you to go_

_I was happy for you_

_And I wanted you to do what you wanted to do_

_I said it was a stupid crush_

_Not even caused by a rush_

_Like your suppose to feel_

_When it is something real_

_But here I am_

_In it again_

_You said sorry_

_Said don't worry_

_We'll still be friends_

_And that's till the end_

_But not this time_

_Cause I'll always want you as mine_

_After I told you bye_

_I let myself cry_

_Like I haven't done freely_

_In a while_

_You left me standing there_

_With a stare_

_As you waved to me_

_And went off to be_

_Whatever you wanted to be_

_They ask me if I cry_

_and I lie_

_They ask me if I miss you_

_I say no_

_I say I wanted you to go_

_I was happy for you_

_And I wanted you to do what you wanted to do_

_I said it was a stupid crush_

_Not even caused by a rush_

_Like your suppose to feel_

_When it is something real_

_But here I am_

_In it again_

_You said sorry_

_Said don't worry_

_We'll still be friends_

_And that's till the end_

_I said no_

_But here I am_

_In it again_

_I'm still in love_

_With the girl that gave me a rush_

_And they all thought it was a crush_

_The girl I cried over_

_I lied to cover_

_What I felt inside_

_In love there is no law_

_To abide_

_So I'll lie_

_To cover what I feel inside_

_But here I am_

_In it again_

_I thought I was doing just fine_

_But you're like a wine_

_Just get better in time_

_And that's killing me_

_Hangin' me by a tree_

_  
You chose him_

_Not me_

_You made your bed_

_So that's how its gatta be…_

He looked over to the producers first, each had smiles etched across their faces. He finally looked to Maddie, who's eyes were glazed over and who's lip was trembling. She was about to cry…


	4. Complications Begin

He sighed as he placed his guitar beside him, before rising. The producers loved it. Why wouldn't they? It was everything a love song was suppose to be. It was everything _he _was suppose to be. But what they didn't know was that that song had more pain in it than he, himself, had ever experienced. And that was saying a lot. That song had nearly drove him over the edge.

He opened the glass door to the recording room and stepped out to talk to his new agent, which happened to be Percy. But he was busy talking to his son and Maddie, whom was putting on an excellent show of being happy. She didn't even look like the girl that was sitting at the chair-which was now beside her-crying her brown eyes out.

"Zack! I don't think we ever introduced ourselves. I'm Evan." Evan said as he reached his hand out. Zack, however didn't shake it he simply gave him a nod, signaling he acknowledged him. Maddie rolled her eyes, which didn't go unnoticed by Zack.

"Well, Maddie was just telling me you and her have been friends since you were twelve, I guess it's a good thing you were too little then, eh?" Evan said jokingly. Zack felt like punching him. "I mean a guy that spends that much time with my girl here had to have a crush, so I guess it's a good thing you were only friends or it'd be you she'd be marrying." he finished.

What the hell? Zack thought with fury. He wanted to punch him. He had the nerve to rub it in his face. Zack clenched his fists, his jaw set; he was angry. _Calm down…he probably doesn't know._ he thought to himself. He relaxed a bit and forced a smile. "Yeah." he said with a mixture of bitterness and sadness.

He looked to Maddie, who was simply staring at the ground. "So when is the big day?" he asked, looking back to Evan.

"We decided to do it on Valentines Day." Evan replied.

"Valentines Day?" Zack blurted. That was in a month. And to him, he thought a wedding on Valentines Day was kind of cliché. Or too overrated.

"Yeah…we couldn't wait." Evan replied, putting his arm around her, but Zack noticed something. She flinched when he did it. And only a moment later she moved away from the slight embrace.

"Well, isn't that nice." Zack replied sarcastically, but wasn't caught by Evan.

Wow! He must be the stupidest guy known to man, Zack thought.

"Yeah well, I have to go." Zack added.

"Alright man, take it easy." Evan replied.

"Yeah you too. Bye Maddie." he said before striding off.

He completely forgot about talking to Percy, who left right when Evan introduced himself. He just walked to a room, reserved for him-it was a sort of thinking room-and had a seat. He leaned back in his chair, listening to the squeak. He thought of Maddie. He thought about the saying, "It's better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all." too bad it didn't make him feel better.

He glanced through a notebook of his work that he had placed in there to give him inspiration. He spotted a song he wrote so long ago. He was 13. It actually brought tears to his eyes at what it said.

_With the fear that you'll leave someday_

_But it still doesn't drive me away_

_With the fear of your rejection_

_I still practice in my own reflection_

_To ask you that question_

_  
Even with my fears_

_I wont stand by with idle tears_

_I wont cower in a corner_

_Like a mouse_

_I ask you everyday_

_You answer the same way_

_And even though _

_I put on a brave face_

_I feel like my world is crumbling through_

_But I'll never give up chase_

_Because, girl…I believe_

_That there is no better match_

_For fate to conceive…._

The rhythm and feeling behind the song was fresh in his memory, though, it was actually so long ago. He was about to finish reading it, when he was interrupted.

"Zack?" called a voice. It was Maddie.

"Yeah?" he asked, drying his tears and leaning forward to see her through the barely cracked door.

"Can we talk?"

"We did." he replied, and she came in closing the door behind her. The room in this space very limited, Zack sucked in his breath, trying to forget of his amount of closeness with her. Claustrophobia overtaking him, it felt this was a broom closet and he couldn't run away from her. He couldn't bare staring at her.

"No we didn't. I know you're hurt, but you cant just keep ignoring me…thinking it's going to go away."

"What else do you want me to do!" he yelled, throwing his hands up.

"I want you to stop! I want you to be my friend again! And I want you to stop singing these songs about me! They are too hard for me to hear."

"Too hard for y-…too hard for! Too hard for you! I have to write these songs! I'm the one who got my heart ripped out and stomped on! I'm the one who had to live everyday at a place that held so many memories! I'm the one who hasn't slept a full night since you left!"

"That isn't fair."

"Yeah…tell me about it. I loved you Maddie. Hell, I still do."

"Don't say that…"

"Forget my age for a second and tell me…do you have feelings for me? I swear I will leave you alone and buy you a wedding gift if you say no."

"I…cant." she whispered, tears forming.

That was his cue. And he was going to take it. He stepped forward, grabbed the back of her head gently and brought her lips to his. His tongue brushed over hers gently, before she opened her mouth slightly. He guided his tongue in, massaging hers, causing a gasp of pleasure escape from her.

His hands explored her body heatedly, until he reached the hem of her shirt. "Zack…" she said abruptly, stepping back. "We cant." she finished. He nodded sadly, stepping back.

Closure. It's a funny word. You would have thought he would have had it by now. But no. Not until that moment. Not until he knew that she couldn't. She was engaged. Age had nothing to do with it now. In that instance he understood. He understood she wasn't making excuses anymore. She just couldn't. Plain and simple.

That kiss had erupted so many of his feelings, but what he hadn't expected was that they erupted hers, as well. He didn't expect her to kiss him back. Hell, he hadn't even expected her to look at him the way she did before the kiss, or even after. What he saw…wasn't guilt, or her feeling sorry for him…what he saw was what he imagined it would look like if he was staring at himself with those brown eyes of hers. What he saw was…love.

He swallowed hard, his Adam's Apple bouncing slightly, catching in his throat. He didn't know why, but at that moment everything became so much more complicated. It wasn't simply loving someone who didn't love you back. Now it was "forbidden," not that he was cliché or anything, but it was the only word he could think of.

Now he could see hurt behind her eyes. Hurt he had felt himself, for so long. Hurt not being able to touch her. Hurt not being able to talk to her. Hell, hurt from not even seeing her.

He didn't see that as either a good thing or a bad thing. Part of him wanted some pain reverted to her. Part of him wanted her to feel what he did over the past two years. But another part of him wanted Maddie to never hurt, that other part of him wanted to protect her forever and wanted nothing more than for her to be happy. And if that was with Evan, he would deal, but now…now he knew she didn't want Evan…part of her wanted him.

Tears glistened over her brown eyes, and her lip began to tremble. Zack hated himself for causing her pain. All of this over his selfishness. Why had he kissed her? But if he hadn't he would have never known there were, indeed, feelings behind those eyes.

He had to know. "Do you love him?" he asked, feeling guilty. She nodded. His head dropped. He couldn't look at her. He didn't think she lied. But he knew that it had just became even more complicated. Zack didn't think a true love triangle could happen. He thought it was only infatuation on at least on side, but this was an actual love triangle.

Maddie ,indeed, had feelings for Evan. It was apparent. Otherwise she would have never agreed to marry him. But through her actions, it was clear, for the first time, that she had feelings for Zack. How long? He wasn't sure, but she did indeed have feelings for him.

Starting at the floor, feeling his eyes swell with tears. Why couldn't she just love him? Only him? Things would be so simple. But they wouldn't. And he knew that. Evan, was another issue. He seemed like a great guy and either he or Zack would be hurt in the end. And Zack was leaning more to the latter.

**(A/N) Thanks a lot for the reviews guys. I appreciate it a lot. This story is going to get a lot more complicated. Maybe Evan isnt the guy people think he is. Maybe he is. Or maybe he's just a great guy...but an action or two of Maddie may forshadow something different...or it could just be a reaction because of Zack. Who knows...well I do lol. If any of you want this story to go a specific way, send me a PM or put it in your review. Thanks a lot again. I appreciated it. REVIEW.**

**P.S. "On A Cruise" will be updated Friday at the latest. It may be updated tomorrow. But who knows...**

**H.P. **


	5. Green Rain

It was Saturday. A night when most teenagers would be out at a party, on a date, or just enjoying the company of their friends or those most precious to them. Not Zack. Not now. It had been three weeks since Percy first talked to him. And tonight was his first major gig.

Tonight was going to be difficult for him. He had to sing something else that caused him pain. The fame and fortune that he was walking towards was great, but it wasn't really worth the pain it caused him to sing his songs. Especially now. The week before Maddie's wedding.

She was to be wedded at a large church. Twelve-hundred guests. On Valentines Day. It didn't seem like a wedding Maddie would want, Zack thought inwardly. He imagined her wanting to get married in a small chapel with only family and friends attending. He imagined it, because that's the way he imagined himself wanting a wedding, and every time he imagined himself getting married it was with her.

All of this was going through his mind as he sat on the stool, in front of millions. The concert was sold out. Mostly girls. And the guys that were there were most likely dragged there by their sisters or girlfriends. He looked out, through the blinding lights in front of him, and saw many signs with 'I Luv U Zack' written on them. He smiled. At least someone did.

"I appreciate you all coming out tonight. And I thought I would start tonight off with a new song. It's called, 'Green Rain' and I hope you like it." he said before playing his guitar. The band around him started to play in melody with his guitar and he began to sing:

_I see the way he looks at you_

_And how he will say, 'I do'_

_I know there's no one to blame_

_As I stand in the green rain!_

_I guess it's my fault_

_That I left my heart an open vault_

_But when they see you and him_

_They all say, 'Aw, look at them.'_

_My fists clench_

_As I'm sitting on the bench_

_I'm a lion_

_No one can tame_

_As I stand here in the green rain_

_I'm soaking wet_

_No room to fret_

_But I'm pissed off_

_No one to share my loft_

_When I see him_

_I want to cough up phlegm_

_He makes me sick_

_When he looks at you…it just makes me tick_

_I have to cool off_

_As I sit in my loft_

_But please no more green rain_

_It is something that cant tame_

_Me at all_

_You'll see me fall_

_Before I soak_

_In the greenness from this bloke_

_No more rain_

_It wont tame_

_The green urge_

_To hit him with a serge_

_Of lightening_

_It's frightening_

_I guess it's my fault _

_That I left my heart an open vault_

_I guess there's no one else to blame_

_That I stand here…in the green rain…_

He faded out and applause sounded loudly. He let tears trickle down his cheeks. He looked to the side of the stage, to find the tear stained face of Maddie. But she was next to him. Evan. Zack's anger burned inside of him, as he felt the pang of envy. He didn't want to be envious. Not at Evan. But he was.

"Thanks, guys. I'm going to take a short break, but let me introduce a friend of mines band. Give it up for 'Misadventures of Purple'." Zack announced and a band covered in purple paint entered the stage and everyone applauded loudly.

"On drums we have my best friend, Oakley! So I'm going to hand it over to him." Zack said proudly, nodding to Oakley. Oakley smiled and pointed to his best friend.

"Hello, Boston! On keyboards we have my other best friend and Zack's brother, Cody." he said and Cody gave a wave.

Oakley continued to introduce the band as Zack made his way off stage. He passed Maddie, who followed. He quickened his pace, considerably, trying to lose her, but it was to no avail. She followed him to his dressing room, slamming the door behind her.

"What do you want, Maddie?" he asked.

"Quit writing those songs." she demanded.

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me…quit writing songs about me."

"Who said they were about you." he said defiantly.

"Zack."

"What Maddie…what! What do you want me to do! Percy wants me to keep writing these songs. He said they seem real! And I have a lot of extra inspiration with a certain wedding coming up." he replied forcefully.

"What do you want me to do?" she asked in an almost whisper.

"Nothing. The same thing you've been doing." he said picking out clothes for the next set.

"Are you even going to talk to me?"

"Why do you always want to talk! We haven't talked in two years until three weeks ago! Why don't you go be with your fiancé and listen to the song as if you were just a fan." he yelled. He flipped his clothes forcefully on to his couch, cursing under his breath.

"I'm sorry…" she said before letting tears stream down her face. "Why is it that our conversations always end with me crying." she said trying to laugh, but only more tears fell.

"I don't want you to cry, Maddie, but I don't know how else to let you know that I cant keep talking to you." he said, turning his gaze to her. He walked slightly to her, pushing her hands off of her face, gently. He took his own hand and wiped her tears away.

"Zack…-" she started.

"Shhh…" he whispered before pulling her into a soft embrace. "I do love you, you know." he said gently in her ear. She nodded against his chest, soaking his shirt from her tears. "I love you, too." she whispered, but he didn't hear it, as it was covered by her intense sobs. She didn't want him to hear it. She didn't want him to think that this was okay. She just had to say it. Aloud. In ear shot. But not in a hearing tone. And what better time than when sobs would cover even the slightest whisper? What better time than now?

**(A/N) I hope you guys liked it. Review!**


	6. How I Despise

Zack's POV

My eyes were swollen when I awoke, and sweat dripped from my brow. I thought about her last night. Again. The blonde haired, light complexioned girl known as Maddie, haunted my dreams. Hell, she even haunted me when I was awake.

Six days. That's all. Until she's married. Wiping the sweat from my face, I struggled off my bed, and to my feet. I walked to the bathroom, rubbing my irritated eyes as I did so.

Putting my hand on the faucet notch that read, "H" I turned it. Running my hand under the trickling water, which fell powerfully, I enjoyed the tingling of the hot liquid against my flesh. I cupped my hands together, allowing the water to fill it them, before splashing my face. I smiled as the water beaded down my face, instantly relieving the puffiness of my eyes from the night before.

The water particles still dripping from my chin, I reached for a towel. Drying my face, smelling the fabric softener that was used on the delicate cloth, made me think of Maddie's scent. Vanilla. Resulting in an entire thought process of her.

What the hell am I doing? I scolded myself, crumbling the towel, before hurling it across the bathroom. Exhaling sharply, I pounded out of the room and stomped into my own. I was pissed off. Her face feeling my thoughts everyday drove me closer to insanity every time, and I was only inches away.

Walking to the stereo, I switched it on, turning the knob as far as it would go, trying to drain out any thoughts of her that would try to build its way in my brain.

I ripped my shirt off, angry, throwing it down, before doing the same to the rest of my clothing. I paced powerfully to my dresser. Opened the drawers loudly before scrambling in and grabbing a tee shirt, jeans, and some boxers, and slamming the drawers, with a bang, before stomping back to the bathroom.

Throwing aside the shower curtain, I entered. I switched the hot water on before adding a small turn of cold, before pulling the faucet tap, allowing the steaming water to spurt out, letting it pound at my flesh.

That is when my anger turned. That is when I allowed myself to break down.

The hot water tingling my flesh, as it beaded down my toned body, and the relaxing steam filling the air, you'd think would calm me, but no. Falling down the side of the shower hugging my knees, I began to sob.

I hated thinking about her. Day after day. I hated looking at her. I hated hearing her name. And I hated, hated singing these songs.

Still able to hear the booming stereo through my shower, I sobbed, because that is the way thoughts of her were. No matter what the distraction, it would never be great enough to rid myself of her intoxicating self. Not really anyways.

My eyes stinging, my breath getting shallow as I huffed with powerful sobs, I didn't know what else to do…

That is how I got here, sitting on the tile floor of my bathroom, my back against the door, with a blade resting in my left hand, and pills strewn on the floor. I wasn't so sure anymore. I seemed to be so sure when I gathered the stuff that this would be it. My way out. But not any more. Now I wasn't sure.

"I'm such a fucking coward," I yelled under my breath, my voice raspy. Raspy from crying. I felt my jaw clench and my muscles tense with fury. Fury at myself. What a freaking pansy ass! "Damn it!" I yelled, pressing the blade to my skin.

"Zack?" a voice called. Cody.

"Shit!" I yelled, gathering the pills and shoving them into my bottle, and throwing the blade away. Thank you, Cody, I thought with a slight smirk on the inside. Somehow, he being there, knocked my back into a relieving consciousness that I didn't have just a moment before. No blood would be lost today. Hopefully never. Hopefully my mind would never get there again. Hopefully.

Throwing a towel around my waist, I opened the door to see Oakley, Cody, and Maddie all standing there. In the door way.

------------------------------------------

Regular POV

Maddie stood there, alongside Cody and Oakley, with an unmoving gaze on Zack's bare chest.

"Sorry, just got out of the shower." Zack said. They nodded.

"Why was your music so loud?" Cody asked.

"Yeah, we had to turn it down. We called for you like five times." Oakley finished.

Truth was Zack didn't even notice. His thoughts were only on two things. Maddie and hurting himself because of Maddie.

"I was exercising earlier, and forgot I had it on when I took a shower." he lied.

"Well, Percy wants to hear this new song…well we all do." Cody said, excitedly.

-----------------------------------------------------

Zack's POV

I sat on the couch, guitar in hand, after Percy showed up…alongside his beloved son. Asshole. I strummed my guitar melodically. Thanking the heavens that Maddie left just moments before, because her brother needed her, I began to sing.

_The sounds flooding in my head_

_Aren't enough to keep you dead_

_Not enough to say good bye_

_Unless it's me…who is to die_

_You don't realize_

_How much I despise_

_Thinking of you_

_And what you do_

_What you smell like_

_Oh how I despise_

_Yes I said, it would be just fine_

_Yes I thought I'd stand in line_

_Knowing that I never could…._

_Have you!_

_All to myself_

_Maybe I'm just selfish._

_Maybe I'm just a kid served on a dish_

_Waiting for him to cut me up_

_Serve me up_

_I'm done for_

_Like a dirty French whore_

_That cant survive_

_The long ass dive_

_  
Into the brown_

_Of your eyes_

_Oh…how I despise_

_I miss you so bad_

_Be we aren't friends as of now_

_So goodbye…chow_

I finished and Percy looked to me, a literal twinkle in my eye. He smiled at me. And so did he. Evan. He smiled?

"What are you smiling at?" I blurted.

"That song was great man." Evan replied smacking me on the arm.

"Don't touch me! And I'm not your man!" I said before throwing my guitar on the couch and storming out of the living room, passed Oakley and Cody, and into my room with a slam of the door.

**(A/N) Well, I hope you guys liked this chapter I didnt plan on updating til Saturday, but I didnt feel like doing my calculas work. Well, REVIEW**


	7. Those Dreams Arent A Reality Anymore

Evan was an idiot to have not figured it out. Who I was singing about. The one I loved and the one I hated. He was an idiot. He seemed to be a good guy, though. Seemed being the operative word.

Looking into his eyes made me wonder if he was as great as it seemed. Seeing her stiffen when he touched her that day entered my mind. Maybe my prejudice in the situation was clouding my judgment, I don't know. But I do know something was telling me not to trust him.

Sitting here, in the present company of my guidance counselor, I thought of these things. Apparently not the best place. I saw her look at me with concern and confusion. Shaking myself out of my stupor, and the state I was flinging my self towards, I spoke.

"Sorry, Ms. Delay. I was thinking."

"About why I called you here?" she asked.

"No ma'am, I know why I'm here." I replied, truthfully. She nodded.

I was late for class eight times in two days. I failed every test I was given and I hadn't sent any replies to my college acceptance letters. Oh…I knew why I was here.

"Do you want to tell me what's going on?" she asked, and I shook my head.

I liked her, but I was never going to tell her my personal business.

"Zack, part of the arrangement your mother made was that you wouldn't do any worse in school. But frankly I don't think that's the problem. Your grades improved so well, until about two years ago then you just stopped trying. I've watched you take a spiral downwards since sophomore year. Your grades were good enough to pass even in this year, but recently they've gotten so much worse. If you were to re apply, I don't know if you would have any acceptance letters. You were so apt to go to college when you were in Jr. grades, up until two years ago. What happened to your dreams?" she lectured.

I felt my eyes stinging with the salty liquid that has been plaguing me lately. When I first arrived at Boston Jr./Senior High, I got terrible grades, until Maddie made me want to be better. Only twelve years old and in a deeper situation that I would have ever imagined. But when she left…I didn't think she was coming back to Boston. I didn't think she was coming back to me.

So what did it matter? It didn't. I just stopped trying after that. My grades went from A's to B's to C's. Now they're F's. What college would take me now? Like Ms. Delay said, if I was to re apply, none.

My life was over anyways, so what did it matter? What was my life?

"They changed." I replied simply before standing and heading out the door.

I didn't stop when I heard her calls of "Zack, we aren't finished." because to me, we were. Walking out of her office only made me feel worse. It didn't make me feel free or liberated, as you might have thought. It made me feel trapped. In my own mind of heartache and hate. In my own wasteful mind.

When I got home, I opened my suite with hesitation, knowing that mom had been contacted about my walkout. Walking in slowly, I spotted her, sitting at the kitchen table already gazing at me through daggered eyes.

"Zackary Martin! Sit down!" she seethed. Knowing I better, I followed her instruction. "First of all you walked out of school!" she started with a yell, spitting on me slightly as she did so. I opened my mouth to explain. What I didn't know, but I was going to try, when she held up her hand. "If you know what's good for you, you will not try to explain, because their isn't an excuse! Your guidance counselor was simply trying to explain to you that your future is so much more important than your past. Oh, yes I know why you're having such a hard time. It's Maddie, and I've known that for a long time. Now I don't know what all you two have been through but I do know she was too old for you then, and now the age difference may not matter as much, but she's getting married! Married, Zack! As in 'I do, forever'! And second of all, you told me you replied to the college you were going to! I don't know exactly what's going on in your head right now, but I do know that you need to straighten up." she lectured loudly.

I didn't know how to reply. I knew what I felt, and I knew that it was Maddie. I opened my mouth to retort, but finding no words, I closed it. I knew she was right. I knew she made sense. I loved my mother for so many reasons, but frankly her honesty wasn't what I loved.

I didn't reply. I got up soundlessly, staring to the ground, before heading to the door. "I'll be back later. I've got a meeting with Percy." I said before heading out the door.

---------------------

Percy had told me I needed one more song to go on my album. One more. And the next batch would go on my next. He told me the world was eating the songs up, that were so real. Sang by the guy that was so real. He told me that the album would sale nation-wide due to everyone feeling heartache, at least once, or they thought they had anyways. The album was to be called, "Zack Martin, A Soul Left Separated". I thought it to be a catchy title. True in a lot of ways.

My last song was to be written before the wedding. At least that's what he told me. So that I could be done with work in time to be the best man for Evan. I didn't want to be. I didn't want to even go, let alone go to the wedding to be his best man. But I knew I was going to. For everyone else.

------------------------------------

Lying on my back, listening to my stereo, I thought of Maddie. I hadn't seen her in two days. Not since the day I wanted to end it all. The suffering, the pain, the hate…the love. Feeling inspiration for my song, I slung my legs over my bed, struggled to my feet, walked to my desk, and got to work.

---------------------------------

The absence of Maddie didn't last long as I sat in the recording room of the stereo, setting up my guitar. There she was. Again. Sitting alone. Where the hell was Evan? I didn't care. She wore her hair up today, in a simple pony tail, allowing me to see more of her beautiful face. I smiled, but seethed at myself knowing that I could never have her.

"We're ready." Percy announced, through the microphone. I nodded.

Today, I called a meeting in light of my new song. My last song. "This is, 'Not Complaining'." I said before strumming my guitar, allowing my band to play with me. It hadn't been long since they first saw the sheet music, hell I only wrote it last night, but they had it nearly perfect.

Honey I haven't saw you

In a while

But baby, I'm not complaining

In anyway

Not today

Haven't seen your smile

Not in a while

But I'm not complaining

Cause I'm not stinging

In the chest!

So I don't care about the rest

When I hear you voice

I have no choice

But to break down

And the rest of the day…have a frown

But I haven't heard it

in a while

But I'm not complaining

In any way

Not today

Salty tears brim my eyes

Oh what a surprise

When I don't see your face

Oh I've lost this race

But I haven't seen you

In a while

Haven't heard your voice

Haven't seen your smile

Not that I'm complaining

Not in anyway

Not today

Got up tonight

Realizing you were right

I should stop singing about you

And doing what I do

So this is the last one

That you'll ever hear

So I'll just dry this tear

Blow my nose

Throw down this rose

It's over

No lies to cover

No song to sing

No suffering

Not going to see that diamond ring

On the finger

That you shushed me with

No tears left

In my eyes

What a surprise

Oh I haven't seen you

In a while

Not since the day

I lay on the tile

Ready to end it all

Ready to take the fall

Not that I'm complaining

Cause I don't feel that sting

In my chest

No suffering

So I'm not complaining

Not in anyway

And not today….

Finishing my song, I realized she was no longer sitting there. I nodded to everyone. They each had their mouth agape. Sitting my guitar on the stool I went to find Maddie, and tell her that today was the last day that they would ever talk.

I searched each room, until I found her in my writing room. Slowly guiding the door open, and stepping in lightly I sat beside her. She stared at me blankly, before she spoke.

"That was the last one?" her voice quivered as she spoke.

"Yeah. I cant keep writing these songs. Maddie, I cant keep feeling like I am nothing, because that's what you make me feel like. I cant be your friend and I cant be at your wedding, so this is probably the last time I'm going to see you. I'm telling Percy I quit, unless I can sing songs about anything. Not just you." I explained the best I knew how.

She nodded. "I wish there was something I could do." she replied, tears starting to brim her eyes. I wanted to reach out and wipe them away, before enveloping her in the biggest kiss of either of our lives.

"Yeah me too. Because I need someone to make me forget…you. I cant keep thinking about you. I cant keep analyzing every girl, comparing her to you. I cant keep thinking you're the only reason that I exist. I cant keep thinking you're the reason I live. I cant keep thinking of you. I have to stop." I ranted, tears forming more powerfully as each sentence left my lips.

She began to sob, huffing breaths escaping her lips as she moved her hand to her forehead to keep her head from falling out of gaze with me.

"Is there any way we can be friends? Any?" she asked.

"No. There isn't. I'm sorry." I replied truthfully.

"Me too." she said through her sobs.

I leaned forward and kissed her forehead. What started out a simple gesture to say goodbye forever, led me to a point of no return. She looked up as I leaned away, peering into my eyes, making me lose all control as I leaned in to kiss her plump limps.

A few pecks, led to a deep enveloped kiss. I smoothed my tongue over her velvet lips, savoring the taste, and begging for entrance. It was granted, as my tongue fluttered into her mouth, intertwining with hers. Our tongues twirled, gallantly, as our mouths fell rhythmically with one another.

I moved my hand from the back of her chair, to her cheeks, smoothing my thumb to her eyes, drying them, all the while continuing my ministrations of the lips. My left hand trailed from her cheek to her neck, pulling her closer. She moaned, causing me to smirk against her lips.

I smoothed my hand to her shoulder and down her arms, causing goose bumps to arise on her flesh. My right hand moved to her waist, pulling her up, to a standing position. I moved her to the wall, with ease, as our mouths still worked together.

I broke, out of breath. I stared into her brown eyes, she was searching mine, trying to guess what I was thinking. And she found it. She found my thoughts, just as easily as I could find hers. We kissed again, softly. Moving my right hand to the hem of her shirt, I moved it upward, revealing her stomach.

I smoothed her flesh, causing her to gasp in pain. I broke our kiss, looking worried. She moved away from me abruptly, but her shirt didn't move downward, so I saw what she was trying to avoid me seeing. I saw the purple-blue shape which inhabited the bottom part of her stomach, no bigger than a fist. A mans fist. I remember what was going through my mind at that moment, 'That son of a bitch'.

**(A/N) I hope you guys liked that chapter. On a Cruise will be updated late tonight. Late being a stressed word in this lol. Please review. I can handle flames...whatever you have to say. Say it. REVIEW**


	8. How Can You Sit There and Pretend?

Fury boiled my blood, and shook my very soul. I looked to Maddie's face, and saw only fear. Her bottom lip trembled and tears glistened on the brim of her eyes. She was frightened. At what I didn't know.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I asked, my voice becoming hoarse.

"I don't want you to worry about it. He's a good guy, he just lost his temper." she replied, as if she believed what was coming out of her mouth.

"Don't give me that shit Maddie! That's what the scum of the earth always tell their girlfriends. 'I'm sorry baby, it was an accident. I'm so sorry. I would never hurt you. Baby, I love you, you know that.' What bullshit! You know as well as I do that this one time has turned into about twenty or so! Hasn't it?" I asked, letting the anger seethe from my lips, hitting her like a ton of bricks.

I didn't like to see her break down, but she needed to realize that this wasn't only a one time thing, this would continue until there was no Maddie left. Not the real one anyways. Not the one I loved. The tears seemed to roll out of her eyes at that moment, as she leaned against the wall, falling down it.

I walked over to her putting a comforting hand on her shoulder. I kneeled to her, my hand still placed on her shoulder and the other making its way to her eyes to wipe away the mascara, that had began to streak down her cheeks. Leaning forward, I kissed her forehead.

"I love you, Maddie. Why cant you be with me? Why do you have to be with him?" I asked, feeling more and more like a twelve year old adolescent as the words developed.

"I just…cant." she said softly, gazing into my eyes.

"How many times?" I asked.

"I lost count…" she said before tears flowed again.

My jaw clenched, and my blood ran hot as I thought of him putting a rough hand on her. Kissing her again on the forehead I left. I wasn't going to go find him and beat the hell out of him. I wasn't going to even look at him. I was going to write a song. A song for two people. Maddie, and the son of a bitch that hit her. I wanted the entire world to hear of this bastard, and everyone hate him for who he really was rather than love him for his reputation. I despised him, and soon, so would the world.

-----------------------------------------------------

Staring into the microphone, two days later, two days before the wedding, I began to strum my guitar. This was the first song in my new album. I was invited to a local radio station to play my new song after Percy heard it and thought it was "pure genius," his words not my own.

I thought it quite ironic that he thought a song of hate towards his song was genius. Evan hadn't heard it yet, and neither had Maddie. They were both so into their wedding arrangements that neither had the time to hear my first recording. It was probably a good thing though. If I would have seen his smug face, touching Maddie, even with the softest touch, I would have beat the hell out of him. I hated him.

I couldn't understand why Maddie was with him. Why she didn't love me back. Why I even cared anymore. But it did hit me, that no matter how much she didn't want to be with me I would always care about and love her.

Strumming louder as the melody picked up I began to sing "How can you sit there".

_I don't understand_

_Why you're with this man_

_Suffering_

_With that damn ring….._

_How can you sit there_

_And watch me stare_

_Into your very soul_

_How can you sit there_

_And know_

_What I now know_

_How can you sit there_

_And pretend_

_That he is the one_

_And that your heart will mend_

_How can you sit there_

_And act happy_

_When I know your really not_

_How can you sit there_

_And cover it up_

_Like there is no bruise_

_How can you sit there_

_And let him abuse_

_Your mind_

_Your body_

_And your soul_

_How can you sit there_

_And know_

_What I now know_

_How can you sit there_

_And let it flow_

_Like it was a day that he wont go_

_ To anymore_

_You know as well_

_As I do_

_That he sure as hell don't love you_

_How can you sit there_

_Eyes dry_

_Pretending you don't cry_

_  
How can you sit there_

_And act like he's the love_

_Of your life_

_Knowing that with him you wont survive_

_How can you sit there_

_And act like you don't love me_

_Like you love him_

_How can you sit there_

_And know_

_What I now know_

_That he pushes you to the floor_

_How can you sit there_

_Smile on your face_

_And pretend that he didn't stab you_

_with a broken vase_

_How can you sit there_

_And know_

_What I know_

_How can you sit there_

_Symbol on your finger_

_Telling the world_

_You belong to him_

_How can you sit there_

_And fall into the depths_

_And no one see_

_Except for me_

_How can you sit there_

_And tell me_

_That you will be okay_

_That he never meant it_

_At all_

_When he made you fall_

_How can you sit there_

_And know_

_What I know_

_And not break down_

_How can you sit there_

_With a smile_

_Instead a frown_

_How can you sit there_

_And know_

_What I now know_

_How can you sit there_

_And pretend_

_Its just a dream_

_Recurring_

_How can you sit there_

_And feel like you owe him_

_When he's taken everything_

_From you_

_How can you sit there_

_With that ring_

_Through the suffering_

_How can you sit there_

_With him_

_When I love you_

_And I would never hurt you_

_How can you sit there_

_And watch me_

_Work with him_

_Day after day_

_Week after week_

_How can you sit there_

_And pretend_

_Your going to be_

_A Brady_

_How can you sit there_

_And wonder_

_What is right for you_

_Like you don't know what to do_

_How can you sit there_

_And know_

_What I now know_

_And not do any thing_

_About it_

_How can you sit there_

_And take all the shit_

_He puts you through_

_How can you sit there_

_Engaged_

_To a man who thinks he's big_

_How can you sit there_

_And question_

_Our love_

_When he hits you _

_into the stove_

_How can you sit there_

_When you know _

_What I now know….._

**(A/N) Okay Okay, I realize the song is longer than the chapter lol, but I'm having trouble updating lately. I was going to do the next chapter for On A Cruise, but it isnt near finished. Its planned out and in a rough draft but it isnt written. I'm sorry. But heres a short chapter in one of my favorites. And I hope you liked the song. It took me a long time to do it. I cant just write lyrics I have to have a melody on my guitar too lol. So...REVEIW!**


	9. Pretending Leads To This

Maddie and Evan drove in silence to the Tipton, to hear Cody and Oakley's band play. Evan was pretty interested in hearing more talent from the Martin's, because Zack's album was selling massively among the younger girls. That was the perfect market. Teen age girls.

He smiled as he gripped the steering wheel, tighter. Taking a left turn, only two blocks from the Tipton, Zack came on the air, announcing a new song.

"Oh, dad was telling me about this one…said it was awesome." he said , turning to Maddie, as he turned the volume up.

_I don't understand_

_Why you're with this man_

_Suffering_

_With that damn ring….._

Maddie's eyes grew wide at the realization that this song was about her as well. He promised not to do any more, she thought with some anger. Gulping almost audibly she reached for the knob to turn it down, hopefully causing Evan to not hear it.

"What are you doing, I'm listening to that!" he yelled, hitting her hand away, and turning it up louder. Her ears rang from the loudness of the song, as the speakers boomed so hard the car vibrated. She tightened her eyes closed, trying to keep from getting a head ache.

_How can you sit there_

_And pretend_

_That he is the one_

_And that your heart will mend_

"I'll tell you what, this kid sure does know how to write love songs." Evan said with a slight smile, at the new "money maker". Maddie rolled her eyes, and absorbed into what the song was saying.

_How can you sit there_

_And cover it up_

_Like there is no bruise_

_How can you sit there_

_And let him abuse_

_Your mind_

_Your body_

_And your soul_

_How can you sit there_

_And know_

_What I now know_

Her eyes widened again and her mouth opened of its own accord, as the tempo picked up, and she realized that this song wasn't just about her, but about the abuse as well. She looked to Evan, who also must have realized it, as his jaw clenched and his eyes narrowed, before he spoke.

"Crying to your friends?" he asked, not taking his eyes off the road.

"No…this song isn't even about me." she replied urgently.

"Bullshit Maddie. All this time…these songs! They've been about you! Haven't they!?" he yelled, his foot stomping the gas to the floor, running up to the back bumper of a black Navigator. He laid on the horn, before swerving around the car, with rage.

"No…" she said a tear falling down her cheek.

_Pretending you don't cry  
How can you sit there_

_And act like he's the love_

_Of your life_

_Knowing that with him you wont survive_

He didn't reply. He only stomped the gas harder, and sped across the black top road, moving quickly to the left side of the yellow lines. Maddie's voice wailed through the air, but he wouldn't stop. Her screeches got louder, as the truck approached from the distance, but suddenly stopped as the bang rang through the air.

_How can you sit there_

_And know_

_What I now know_

_That he pushes you to the floor_

_How can you sit there_

_Smile on your face_

_And pretend that he didn't stab you_

_with a broken vase_

_How can you sit there_

_And know_

_What I know….._

Glass strewn on the black top, caused the paramedics to step with ease. They shined their lights into the first car, where mumbling was heard. But when they approached, no one was speaking. It was the radio sounding softly…

_How can you sit there_

_When you know _

_What I now know…_

Maddie could hear only faint voices ringing through her ears. They were urgent and quick, but her mind slowed them and switched the volume of their voices to low. Her eyes twitched open slightly and she saw about seven people hovered over her, one holding an I.V.

She felt her self being taken quickly through a white corridor. Her body was still, yet she felt air coming towards her, through the corridor. Her surroundings became cleared as each second passed, as well as her consciousness. She was being wheeled down the hospital hall on a stretcher.

The taste of blood was evident throughout her mouth as she tried to speak. However, no words came, only gurgles, which made her choke. She coughed loudly, causing her throat to burn. Her breath caught, and she felt as if no air was coming through. She gasped before she heard a woman speak to her.

"Madeline, just hang in there. It's okay. You're at the hospital. You're going to be fine. Just don't try to speak, you have glass caught in the back of your throat. Just calm down, it'll be fine." the woman reasoned, before Maddie nodded, comprehending everything.

The accident, she speculated. But where was Evan? And what about the other car? She didn't know, and her eyes became heavy again, before they fluttered shut.

------------------------------------------

"Zack!" a worried voice rang from behind Zack, who was sitting on the stool, in the recording room, of the studio, strumming slightly on his guitar. Turning quickly he saw a worried Oakley through the glass of the studio, pressing the intercom button. Setting his guitar down, he exited the recording room, urgently.

"Zack…it's Maddie." was all Oakley had to say before Zack knew something was wrong. He shoved passed Oakley and started down the hall in a run, before calling behind:

"What hospital?!"

"St. Anne's!" Oakley called to him, before watching Zack skid to a halt before taking the left turn into the hallway that would lead to the exit.

------------------------------------------

Bursting through the doors, half worried, half angry, he ran to the service desk.

"Madeline Fitzpatrick, I heard she was taken here." he said urgently to the young girl behind the counter.

"Are you immediate family?" she asked, typing quickly on the computer in front of her.

"No, ma'am. But I have to know how she is. Please." he pleaded.

"I'm sorry. I cant. I'm not permitted." she apologized, looking back to her computer.

Banging his fist to the desk, causing a slight crack into his hands, which made his face stiffen, he backed away angrily. "I'm sure you're very sorry." he said sarcastically, walking down the hall urgently.

"Zack?" a voice said from behind him. He turned to see an older woman, whom he had never seen before. "You are Zack, right?" she asked.

"Yes, ma'am. Who are you, if you don't mind me asking?"

"I'm Maddie's grandmother." she replied.

"Oh, the one that lives with her." he said. "See I met her other grandma. So I was a little confused." he explained, and she nodded. "So how is she?" he asked suddenly.

"They'll barely tell us anything. She's being operated on. Apparently, she has a pierced lung, causing breathing to be difficult. But other than that they wont say anything, except she was in a car accident, apparently caused by her fiancé." she explained.

Zack's blood ran cold, as his fists clenched. Evan had almost accomplished what he longed for; the elimination of Maddie. Zack wondered with hatred, if he felt like a man.

"I hate that guy." Zack seethed.

"She'll be fine." her grandmother said, leading him towards the waiting room, where his mother, Cody, and Moseby sat, along with her parents, who, surprisingly, weren't fighting at the time. No. They sat still. And quiet. As the fate of their daughter was being decided by a team of doctors.

**(A/N) I hope you guys liked this chapter. I wanted to get it out here. So it may not be that great. I was at my grandmother's in TN, for about a week and I didnt get a chance to get online. Man, it is so cold down there. It was like 30 degrees. And I didnt bring a jacket or any other kind of shoes other than flip flops so, I pretty much froze my ass off. It felt like friken winter down there, gawd!**


	10. Blaming Leads to No Truth

It was my turn to see her. I didn't want to go. I felt my heart flummox inside my chest as I walked to the door. My feet were almost quaking beneath me, as I faced the frame. Exhaling sharply, I reached for the handle, hearing the beat of my heart fill my ears. I turned and pushed the door ajar. I wasn't ready to see her…but I was ready to face the reality. The truth.

I knew from the second I walked into the hospital this would be the moment that it became real to me; the moment I saw her. I knew what Evan had done, yet I did nothing, except write a song. A song? It seems so pointless now. So….stupid.

I knew when ever my gaze would strike her face, would be the moment that it became so clear. I knew that moment would be the time where my blood would boil throughout my very soul and my heart shake along with my fist at the man responsible. And possibly at myself…

Nothing. And I mean nothing, that I was expecting was what I felt at this moment. I felt all air rush from my lungs, as I began to feel light headed. I grabbed the handle, which I hadn't even let go of, tighter to steady myself. My gaze fell to the floor, and I didn't know if I could handle this. Seeing her like this...was almost unbearable. She was vulnerable. And vulnerability wasn't Maddie. And I didn't want to see her in that state…

My hair falling lightly into my eyes, stung my corneas slightly, causing me to brush the follicles away and gaze up. And there, I caught the sight once again. Vulnerability, from someone who was never vulnerable before. Well not until she met _him_. Evan. My heart pounded under my chest, threatening to burst out.

Her face. Her majestic face, was bruised about her right eye to the corner of her lip, and a few stitches on the afore mentioned cheek. I winced. I felt as her pain was mine. The purple bruises should be mine, I seethed to myself, as I clenched my teeth.

I walked closer, expecting the warm feeling of Maddie's presence to surround me. But alas, that wasn't so. There was no warmth. The air was as cold as ice, as a shiver rolled down my spine, but not concluding until it ran the length of my entire body.

Standing at the foot of the bed, I looked away from her face, to see what other damage was done. And my jaw clenched at the sight before me. She was only uncovered from the chest up, and I winced in pain, at the bruises along her fore arm and hands.

Stitches ran along the entirety of her right fore arm, I noticed. From a jagged piece of glass, I thought, bitterly.

Walking along the right side of her bed, where the most damage seemed to be done, my breath hitched. I closed my eyes tightly, wishing that this image wasn't real. Hoping for a nightmare. And I groaned in anguish and a tear seeped down my cheek, as I opened them and the hellish surrounding was still there.

I looked back to her forearm, and soothed my index finger over the stitches gently. I sucked in a breath as I remembered what her skin felt like, just the day before. Smooth and elegant. Not like this. This was jagged, and rough. This wasn't the feel of Maddie, and I didn't want it to be now either. Even if only temporary. That jagged feel wasn't her. That feel was intended for someone else. Someone harsh and unkind. Not Maddie. Someone like Evan…or even…me. I swallowed hard and my Adam's apple seemed to clutch and cause my breath to catch. I coughed loudly, burning my throat, as I held the tears threatening to fall.

I trailed my hand to hers, grasping it lightly, before smoothing my thumb over the back of her hand, ever so lightly. I thought, maybe, by these soft motions, she would feel, maybe even one ounce of comfort in this horrendous state. At least, I hoped as much.

Sighing, I kneeled before her side, and pressed my forehead lightly to our intertwined hands. I wouldn't let one tear fall from my stinging eyes, as it wasn't my place to cry. It was Maddie's, if anyone's. The girl who endured the pain. Not the one seeing the after effects.

My voice seemed to come of its own accord, but only spoke one word, "please…". I lifted my head from our intertwined hands, and looked above me. Hoping a miracle would happen and her eye lids would flutter open. I closed my eyes lightly and thought of her. Just her. No backgrounds. No one else. Just her. Not memories of stuff we had done. Nothing. Just her.

A slight smile, curved my lips slightly, before someone knocked lightly. My eyes darted open, as I saw my mom standing in the doorway looking to me; pity and sorrow filled in her eyes. I nodded, knowing my time was up, and knowing Maddie's eyes did not flutter open. But I kept my hope that maybe, she would, indeed be fine…

------------------------------------

"You okay?" Carey asked her eldest twin son, as they walked side by side, down the dimly lit, hallway of the hospital.

"No…" he sighed.

"Zack…?" she asked slightly, knowing that her son had loved the girl, lying vulnerable down the hall, since they first moved into the Tipton.

"Where is he?" he spoke suddenly, remembering one detail, that had yet been worked out inside his mind.

"If you mean Evan…I don't really know. He left about an hour ago." she replied, causing Zack to halt suddenly.

"You mean that son of a bitch is still alive!?" Zack yelled.

"Language, Zack!" Carey yelled, outraged.

"Mom, he abuses her! And something tells me that this was no accident! And that asshole's still breathing!?" he yelled, just as outraged, if not more, at his mother.

Carey gasped, as her hand flew to her mouth, not wanting to believe what her son had just told her, but knowing it was true. And Carey was angry. Not just at Evan…but at herself…

Flashback

_It was storming soundly, as Carey sat in her suite, alone, watching TV, late one night. Zack had a late gig, and Cody was staying at Oakley's. And she was grateful. She smiled at a night alone. She hadn't had one in a while. _

_As she curled on the sofa, watching a movie. One of the boys'. Batman. She didn't really care for it, but it had George Clooney, her favorite actor, and possibly the love of her life. Smirking at the part where he kissed Poison Ivy, she spoke loudly in a whooping type voice, "Yeah, girl! You are so lucky!"._

_She laughed at her own silliness and a knock was heard. Muting the TV, she made her way to the door. Flinging the door ajar, Carey's eyes widened at the look of a terrified Maddie._

"_Honey, what's wrong?" Carey asked suddenly._

"_Oh, it's nothing. I- just hurt my self outside, and it's storming so I guess I'm just a little on the edge." she said, walking into the suite. "But could I stay here tonight?"_

"_Sure honey. The boys aren't here, so you can have their room." she replied, but little did she know that Maddie knew all that. And knew that that would mean an extra room._

"_Thanks Carey." she said, sounding gratefully, but Carey didn't know just **how** grateful she truly was._

_End Flashback_

She cursed herself for not knowing. How could she not have? It was obvious. Bruises. Lame excuses. Long shirts. All the tell-tale signs of abuse. It was all there…

**(A/N) Well I hope you guys liked that chapter. Uh...it doesnt have a song in it. Most of the chapters within the next few weeks probably wont. In fact, he sort of looses his inspiration, which is pretty much told in this chapter. Most of it was his feelings towards her being in the hospital. Some blame and resentment, not only towards Evan but towards himself. And not only he is feeling this but Carey is starting to blame herself too. Blame is a large part of emotions that are most of the time misused. You blame yourself for everything that happens to a loved one, and that's just human nature, to feel some sort of blame...**

**Well anyways I hope you guys liked it...I needed something to do before One Tree Hill came on and I guess here it is lol.**

**Special thanks to: **

Cego, jcg2491, DracoLuvsGinny, ac5000, DeigoAlmirante, MissHollywood6, rglover98, Lennie1984, Rongo, Degrassi.n.TSl lover, perfectbliss, Sandt21, XxCandyxCounterxGirlxX, Emma718, devilinangel, HHr Its what i believe, Suite Life ZC, GilmoreGirlAddict, Secret Identity, Analeah, A-Cheery-Melody, RIP MuM i love you so much, suite-princess all of whom have reviewed thus far.

**Alright now, go down an inch or so, and click go next to where it says "Submit Review" and type me one up and click send. If you arent a member then just type a name in on nickname, and if you do not wish to put an email address DONT, send anyways.**


	11. I Wrote A Song About My World Drowning

Zack's POV

I didn't know where else to go. Mom wouldn't let me at the hospital for more than an hour now, since I hadn't eaten the last time I went and I refused to leave to do so. Why couldn't she understand? Something didn't feel right about leaving her alone. Or being alone, myself.

Sitting on the stool of my small room in the studio, I remembered what was happening before I found out the truth. Before I knew of what an asshole Evan really was. I remembered when we kissed, in this very room and I remember my senses switching into an overload.

I remembered the scent of her favorite perfume. Which was engraved into my memory as the scent of Maddie. I remember the feel of her lips on mine. The warming feeling of her so close to me. I remembered it all. All to well.

"Zack?" called a voice, after a soft peck. I turned to see who it was and my face immediately fell. I wondered what he was doing here, but figuring he was, indeed, my manager I accepted that as a common, rational answer, and signaled for him to come in.

"I was-" he started, but I didn't allow him to continue as I cut him off.

"Checking on me?" I asked, rhetorically. "I'm fine. I'm not the one in the hospital." I continued bitterly.

"Yes, well it's just you've been really-" he started again, and again, I interrupted.

"Upset? Yeah. Pissed? Yeah. Ready to kill your abusive son? Definitely." I replied, crossly.

"I know about it…I've known for a while. Just like I knew that the songs were about Maddie, and that Evan was the guy you were referring in the last song. I'm not a complete inferior to you, Zack. I realize I may not be the smartest of individuals, although I dress like I am. And I realize I don't have an ounce of talent, but I can spot sure signs when I see them. And I see a sure sign that you're in love with her, that you hate Evan and that you are possibly the real deal in music." Percy replied.

I always thought Percy was wise, but never did I believe he was intelligent. And I still didn't. I just believed he was wiser than possibly any man I had ever known.

"Oh, the music part reminds me….I wrote a new song…it isn't by any means finished, but it's a start." I said, remembering. I literally watched his facial expression change from seriousness to happiness in a matter of moments. His lips curled so far upwards, I could see all of the upper part of his mouth, making me show a saddened smile.

"It wasn't a happy song was it?" Percy asked, growing more serious.

"Are they ever?" I asked, matter-of-factly. "It's about what I was feeling when I walked into the hospital room. It isn't by any means happy. In fact, it pretty much makes me lose hope that anything good can happen in the world."

"Sounds like a money maker!" Percy said, slapping his hands together, and I knew he wasn't being sarcastic, which caused me to smirk. "Plug in, let's hear it so far." he finished, urging me to play by grabbing my guitar and handing it to me.

I shrugged, taking the guitar, and plugging it in to the amp beside me, before strumming a few of the cords that I wrote only hours after visiting Maddie in the hospital for the first time.

_It's like looking down_

_From a far off town_

_Somewhere in the sky_

_How can you be here?_

_In this very state_

_Looking like you are_

_Not going to change_

_My world is growing cold_

_There is no where to go_

_No where to run_

_My heart beats faster than a gun_

_Shoots a bullet_

_Rip it and pull it_

_It cant hurt much worse_

_No warmness in the air_

_When I'm near_

_My feet start quaking_

_Hands are shaking_

_Grab that damn door knob_

_Seeing you in this far off land_

_Is no vacation for me_

_It's like starting in the sand_

_Blink, and now drowning in the sea_

_How many times must I tell you_

_Don't stray too far from me_

_I try to be your damn floatee_

_But you will never let me_

_Peering down at your motionless form_

_Causes the world to stop_

_Breathing slows_

_And nothing goes_

_Cause without you_

_I wont know if there will be anything to do_

_No warmness in the air_

_When I'm near_

_My feet start quaking_

_Hands are shaking_

_Grab that damn door knob…_

I finished strumming, and looked to Percy for approval. His smile told me that I had succeeded in the rough draft. Hopefully the finality would be approved, as well.

"So…why aren't you at the hospital? You obviously love her." Percy asked me.

"Mom wont let me. Last time I didn't want to leave and I didn't eat, so now I can only stay an hour each day. And I used it this morning." I replied.

He nodded. Believe it or not, I was kind of relieved that I had someone to talk to that wouldn't tell mom my every word out of context. Placing the guitar beside me, I stood.

"Zack, if you ever want to talk about it…" he started, but he didn't have to finish. I knew what he meant. I knew he meant it too. I could tell that he really did mean it.

Flipping my notebook closed, I exited behind him. I needed to go home. I needed to rest. But I needed to see Maddie more. I wanted to be there when she woke up…I needed to be there when she woke up.

Massaging my shoulders slightly, I walked to my car. I was going to the hospital. What ever mom didn't know wouldn't hurt her, I suppose. Who cares if she found out anyways? This was bigger than my mother and I, this was Maddie's life. And unconscious or not, I would be a part of it.

**(A/N) Well, I hope you liked that chapter. It really is just a rough draft that I had written out on a crumpled piece of paper lol. So I'm sorry if it isnt up to par. LOL. I still hope it was good though. Well give me some feedback!**

**Hayden**


	12. Let Her Go, If Only For Just A Moment

Watching, as her breathing fell rhythmically with the rise and fall of her chest, I grasped her hand gently. Even though the warm atmosphere she had always created for me before, and the warmth that made my heart feel at ease, wasn't there, I still found she looked beautiful.

Sleeping soundly, oblivious to even the roughest touch and the loudest sound, I found she looked like Sleeping Beauty; only in small slumber, awaiting a kiss from her prince. But I was no prince. I caused this. And even though I hadn't driven the car, I knew I was responsible. I didn't really know how I was responsible, but I felt it.

Her bruises had healed somewhat, and everything appeared fine health-wise, but there was just something that was keeping her from waking up. The nurse had told me--after some heavy schmoozing on my part--that this was a unique situation, unlike so many other coma cases. This one seemed to not have a rational answer to the million dollar question that I desperately asked everyday.

Massaging the back of her hand with my thumb softly, I leaned forward to leave a small kiss upon her forehead. Leaning back up, a single tear fell from my eyes onto her milk-white cheek, before a small peck at the door sounded. I called my attention to it, to see my brother, standing frailly in the doorway.

"Hey…" Cody said softly at the door.

"Hi…where's mom?" I asked.

"The Tipton. I told her I was going to see Maddie, I didn't know you'd be here." he answered, just as soft as before, opening the door a little more. He entered slowly, and his footsteps were soft, as if he feared waking her. But she wouldn't wake. I knew that. "How long have you been here?" he asked me. I shook my head, not really knowing.

"What time is it?" I asked.

"Eleven-thirty a.m." he answered.

"No…that isn't right…I got here at three p.m." I pointed out.

"You haven't been here since yesterday… have you?" he asked, putting his hand on my shoulder, and looked to Maddie, his face in a fallen sadness.

"No…I couldn't have been here more than a couple of hours." I answered, shrugging his hand off of my shoulder.

"This isn't healthy Zack!" Cody yelled, sounding fed up. I scoffed loudly.

"Maddie's the one lying here! I'm not leaving until she wakes up!" I yelled back to him. "And if you don't want to see me being 'unhealthy' there's the door!" I finished, pointing to the door, before looking back to Maddie.

"Zack…she'll wake up, but don't force her…" he said quietly, before walking, head down, out the door.

----------------------------------------

After he left, I let his words soak into my mind. He was right, I realized. I couldn't push her. I couldn't stress her. She may never wake up if I do. Squeezing her hand slightly, I bowed to kiss her forehead before leaning to her ear. I wanted to say something….I had to say something.

"I love you…………..and I promise that when you're well I'll leave you alone forever if you want." I spoke softly, feeling my throat clench in the anxiousness of it all. I was anxious for her to open her brown eyes, so I might look into them once more…even if it was the last time, because is she truly wanted it…I would leave her alone. I just had to know she was okay. "But you have to wake up first…. I have to see that you're okay…I love you…I really do." I whispered louder, yet still soft, into her delicate ear, before releasing my hold on her hand and leaning up.

I gave her one last glance, before turning on my heel and walking towards the door. A glance that would have to do me until she woke up, because I made a pledge to myself that I wouldn't return until then. Because if I did, I knew I would drive myself mad. Sniffing, I moved my hand to my cheek and wiped the single tear that was threatening to spill onto the floor away.

As I reached for the door knob, I sighed, thinking about how I had just let the love of my life go…or at least until she awoke. I turned the brass handle with hesitation, but I turned it none the less, before pushing the door open to begin _my_ life the way I needed to. Not the life I wanted to…

The life I wanted included Maddie. The life I wanted included happiness. The life that I _needed_, included the same but there was a difference. Because needs change as time flows, as they have to adapt to certain situations. And at this time I _needed _a life. And being in a hospital day after day wasn't a life. It was an obsession. And though there is a thin line between a want and a need, there's a thick one between a want and an obsession. Needs are the wants that are necessary for survival. And to survive I _needed _to let go…and I would. For as long as it took. But I also _needed _Maddie, but not as she was now. I couldn't bare to see her in that God awful state forever. Not even for another minute, as I could already feel the effects of my world crumbling beneath me.

As I walked through the hallway it felt as if the walls were closing in on me, and that each step took and eternity to complete. I knew I was telling myself that this was the wrong decision, but it wasn't. And I knew that.

I let my shoulders slump, as my head fell to the floor to continue my pace towards the exit. My hair fell loosely into my eyes, drying the tears that were threatening to fall before they even dripped from my eyes. I cleared my throat, as a huge lump closed my air way.

When I hit the end of the hallway, finally, I saw someone that I hadn't expected to. I thought he left after telling me to not push her, but he didn't. I should have known better, it was Cody after all. My eyes hazed over slightly as I saw him standing, his hands deep within his pocket, leaning against the wall, and wearing a saddened face. And though he stature, was as frail as before, he wore a confident expression through his sadness. He knew he was right. And he knew that I knew that he was right.

Reaching him, he nodded, before patting me on the shoulder slightly and joining me at my side and walked with me as I continued down the hall. "I love her, Cody…" I said automatically.

"I know…but you know that old saying, 'If you love someone set them free, if they were truly yours they'll come back, if they don't…they never were…"

I nodded. I knew he was right. And, though, I could feel my throat burning as well as my eyes, I knew that this decision, though, however hard it was, was the right decision for me. It was what I needed to do for myself, as well as for Maddie.

"Zack?" Cody asked, stopping me.

"Yeah?" I choked through a sob.

"It's going to be okay…" he said, a slight smile curved in his lips. I smiled. I loved my brother. And I loved how he could feel confident and hopeful when all others lost both completely. I loved how he could be sensitive when all others would tell me to suck it up. I loved how his soft expression and confident smirk made me believe that he was right. And that everything really would be okay.

**(A/N) Hey guys...sorry for the wait. I hate that you had to do so much waiting...but I really appreciate everyone who's reading this and I will try and update before Christmas, but if I dont MERRY CHRISTMAS! **


	13. Superior Strength of Hope and Love

Strumming my guitar as I sat on the plump couch my feet propped lazily on the coffee table, I looked to Cody. He sat beside me, headphones plugged into his keyboard keying away aimlessly, yet somehow accurately. He seemed to be pleased with what he was playing, yet I didn't know what it was.

Nudging his shoulder slightly, he quit playing and looked to me with worried eyes. I knew he walked on egg shells around me lately. Worrying every minute of everyday. Except when he played his keyboard. And I wanted to know what he was playing.

"How about unplugging your headphones? I want to hear this…" I said a little hopeful.

He smiled, before unplugging his keyboard, and setting his fingers in their starting places. I smiled, too, happy that my brother would share his song.

"I've been writing it for a while. I'm not a very good singer, and I haven't given it to Oakley yet about the band learning it, so I don't know what it sounds like at its best potential." Cody said, before letting his fingers glide along the keys effortlessly.

_Verse 1: Moving slowly_

_Through the rain_

_Feeling everything but pain_

_I feel joy and somehow regret_

_That it's you who always frets_

_Sometimes I know how you feel_

_And others I cant believe its real_

_Vocal break, melody continues for five counts_

_Lower tone keys shift in for chorus_

_Chorus: You're truly strong_

_The superior_

_And I guess that makes me your inferior_

_But this I don't care_

_Because in this you truly fair!_

_Na, na, n-na, na, na, na_

_N-na, na, n-na, na, na_

_Vocal break, melody continues for three counts_

_Verse 2: No matter what you think_

_My future could change in a blink_

_But at least your strong_

_Enough to hold on_

_Strong enough to sing a song_

_That'll tear your insides out_

_Make you want to shout_

_I cant believe someone like you_

_Can always know what to do_

_And though you think you don't_

_You do_

_And how I wish I could be like you_

_Vocal break, melody continues for five counts_

_Chorus: You're truly strong_

_The superior_

_And I guess that makes me your inferior_

_But this I don't care_

_Because in this you truly fair!_

_Na, na, n-na, na, na, na_

_N-na, na, n-na, na, na_

_Vocal break, melody continues for three counts_

_Verse 3: Two peas in a pod_

_They say and it's a crock_

_My other half_

_You're changing fast_

_And somehow I can tell it will last_

_Vocal break_

_Melody continues for five counts_

_Chorus: You're truly strong_

_The superior_

_And I guess that makes me your inferior_

_But this I don't care_

_Because in this you truly fair!_

_Na, na, n-na, na, na, na_

_N-na, na, n-na, na, na_

_Vocal break, Melody continues for three counts_

_Verse 4:I always wanted you to know_

_That somehow you were going a route I couldn't go_

_Somehow our worlds separate_

_And though your heart penetrates_

_It's still stronger than I could think_

_I could be on any link_

_Maybe its her_

_I'm not quite sure_

_But you've always believed_

_There was more_

_And someday it'd show, you were sure_

_No matter how sore_

_It would make you in the end_

_You didn't give in the defend_

_Vocal break, continues for five counts_

_Chorus: You're truly strong_

_The superior_

_And I guess that makes me your inferior_

_But this I don't care_

_Because in this you truly fair!_

_Na, na, n-na, na, na, na_

_N-na, na, n-na, na, na_

_(fades out)_

I was amazed. And though, I always knew my brother could write songs, I didn't know that he could write something like that. About….me?

**(A/N) Yes, I realize it was a SHORT chapter...shorter than any I've done...the reason for this is because it's not a real chapter...it's just a scene I suppose. I wanted to get this chapter out there though...because it's a brotherly moment, and aslo for it I wrote this song with a friend of mine, her name is Whitney and we had a great time, but I wanted to know what you guys thought. I tried to put counts in so you might get a LITTLE bit of an idea of how the song went...and if I messed it up she's probably going to have my head...she wrote the melody because I'm not wonderful on the piano...not even close to wonderful actually...however I added a little guitar in it and I think it sounded better, but Whitney had the idea of keeping it simple, especially for the story, because what would be the point of all that extra work of writing guitar music for a song that will never be heard...hmmmm? Yeah I kinda forgot that part lmao. But it might be a fun little project...when I'm bored or something lol...**

**But anyways...I hope you all had a fantastic New Year and Christmas, and please dont kill me for this chapter, or lack there of...just enjoy the song...oh wait you cant even hear it! damn! lol. Yeah it sounds better with a girl voice(whitney) but we didnt think I sounded to awful either...and I imagine Cody to have a similar voice to me (as far as pitch goes) so it probably sounded alright. In my imagination anyways.**

**Alright Next chapter we get to hear more of Maddie's situation (Next Week, I PROMISE)...oh and those who read With Tears Comes Loneliness...its being...CONTINUED! Alright this A/N has been longer than the actual chapter so thanks for bearing with me...**

**H.P.**


	14. When Good Happens in Reality

"That's awesome, Cody!" I exclaimed, hitting his shoulder roughly, yet playfully. "Whoa!"

"What?" Cody asked.

"It's just I never thought I'd say that…I think the universe is really screwing up…" I replied with mirth.

"Hardy Har Har…but I guess any universe where you're a rock star and girls drool over you would have to be screwed up!" he replied, causing me to push him over. Watching him flip over the arm of the couch dramatically made me erupt a laugh. The first laugh I had had in a long while actually.

"Hey boys." mom called, having just walked in the suite.

"Hey mom." we replied in unison, Cody still on the ground.

"Zack…what'd you do to your brother?" she asked with a slight smile. I could tell she knew how much I had been going through and just liked the fact that I was being more of my old self again. And at that moment, that was all that mattered.

"Nothing…." I replied innocently.

"All joking aside, someone help me up…" Cody groaned.

"Dude, get up yourself." I replied, walking around the couch to see Cody crumpled on the floor. "What? Did you gain fifty pounds or something?" I asked tauntingly, putting my foot on his stomach to make it even harder for him to get up.

What I didn't know, was that he was planning something just like that. Because as soon as my foot touched his stomach, he grabbed it forcefully and pulled me down right beside him.

------------------------------------------------------

It was something; having time for my family. Ever since the entire record deal that was placed upon me, I hadn't had any time for them. Not much anyways. And ever since Maddie's accident, I took some time away from my entire career life to be with them. Maddie….I missed her so much and it took my family and time off to help me cope with the fact that it might be a long time before she awoke.

However, I still had been writing songs. Songs too personal for even Percy. And that was pretty personal, seeing as that every feeling that I felt was written in a song that he turned into something that everyone in the world heard.

I actually started writing on the one that I began writing so many years ago when I was just 13. (a/n: this song is earlier in the story…you'll get to read it later in the story and it will be finished.) But other than that song, I completed one, one that I felt would help me, but ended up making me cry every time I read over it.

_A sign_

_A sign that you'll be alive_

_Is what I need to get by_

_Beating and beating and beating along_

_But every time I seem to doubt_

'_Cause the truth becomes really stout_

_And I know that no matter what I have to go_

_I cant watch you anymore_

_Beating and beating and beating along_

_Beating and beating and beating away_

_I know that I cant stay_

_So I'm beating and beating and beating myself hard_

_Trying to find a single shard_

_Fly away _

_From the flesh where it stays_

_So I'll keep beating and beating and beating _

_Faster and faster and faster_

_To find this the biggest disaster_

_Tell me is this the end?_

_Are we going to descend?_

_And though I feel a part of me gone_

_And I want to be all alone_

_They wont let me_

_And I don't think it's as bad as it could be_

_Beating and beating and beating along_

_Because I could not have them_

_Flick the tear at the brim_

_Of the eye that saw you_

_Lying in a bed with no movements to ensue_

_Beating and beating and beating along_

_I cant believe that you arent around_

_The way that you used to be bound_

_To be everyday_

_Even in the same way_

_A friend_

_Beating and beating and beating along_

_Beating and beating and beating away_

_I know that I cant stay_

_So I'm beating and beating and beating myself hard_

_Trying to find a single shard_

_Fly away _

_From the flesh where it stays_

_So I'll keep beating and beating and beating _

_Faster and faster and faster_

_To find this the biggest disaster_

_Tell me is this the end?_

_Are we going to descend?_

_Find a way to reach you_

_Is what I want to do_

_But how am I suppose to find that truth_

_When everything I do turns to me going back to you_

_Beating and beating and beating along_

_I cant stand this fight anymore_

_Because I don't see exactly what I'm fighting for_

_There is no me and you_

_You've made that clear as waters blue_

_Beating and beating and beating along_

_And I don't feel I have long_

_Without you my only one_

_Beating and beating and beating away_

_I know that I cant stay_

_So I'm beating and beating and beating myself hard_

_Trying to find a single shard_

_Fly away _

_From the flesh where it stays_

_So I'll keep beating and beating and beating _

_Faster and faster and faster_

_To find this the biggest disaster_

_Tell me is this the end?_

_Are we going to descend?_

_But don't worry….._

_I'll just keep….._

_Beating and beating and beating along…….._

Tapping my pencil lightly atop the edge of my desk inside me and Cody's bedroom, the phone rang. Sniffling from the tears about to escape, I picked it up…and it was the call I least expected. At least now.

"Zack?" a voice asked. "Shut up!" the mans voice shouted.

"What?" I asked, confused as to why he would tell me to shut up.

"Not you, Zack." he replied quietly. "I said shut up, I'm on the phone!" he shouted again, obviously pulling the phone away from his mouth as he yelled, trying to drain out his voice a little bit. But then Zack heard another voice even louder.

"Don't tell me to shut up!" it was a female voice, and she sounded angry, and I guessed it had something to do with him telling her to shut up. "Give me the phone." he heard her voice sound again, before hearing a slapping noise.

"Zack?" the female voice asked hurriedly.

"Yeah." I replied, feeling both scared and confused.

"This is Maddie's mother. She's awake and she's asking for you. She wont tell us much about the accident, all she wants is to talk to you right now. She seems a little shaken up, but the doctor said that it was probably just grogginess-" she began to explain but I cut her short and in a panicked breath spoke loudly, "I'll be right there!" before dropping the phone quickly.

I took my strides quickly to the door. Mom and Cody both asking questions I wasn't ready to answer, nor did I want to answer as I was in the hurry of a lifetime. Instead of explaining I simply spoke one word, "Maddie." and that seemed to get them to shut up, at least for the time being.

I was sure that by the tone of my voice they understood somewhat, about what was happening. But I didn't care. They would find out soon enough. All I cared about at that moment was getting to my car and driving as fast as I could to the hospital, hoping that the traffic wouldn't be bad.

--------------------------------------------

Running through the hall, I finally made it to the room where the fate of my future with Maddie was going to be decided. Skidding to a halt, hearing my feet squeak against the waxed tile of the hospital floor, I turned out of breath to the entrance of her room.

I knocked, figuring the family was with her, and I didn't want to interrupt. And my assessment was correct as her parents came out, still bickering among themselves about something completely unknown. I sighed, knowing I was about to have the biggest talk of a lifetime and walked in.

"Nice to see not much has changed, huh?" I asked immediately seeing her expression crestfallen obviously from her parents' exit. She smiled at the comment, yet only lightly, but at that moment that was good enough. Because God knew how long I had longed to see even the slightest movement from her.

Stepping lightly towards her, I held my breath, and looked to her cautiously. It was as if I was afraid that she would fall back into a deep sleep. And when I approached, I felt something that I had missed for so long. A feeling that she didn't harbor the last time I saw her…..I felt warmth. Maddie's warmth. And I smiled knowing that Cody was right all along. Everything would be fine. And now instead of the feeling that it would be fine, it was a reality. And in truth I always liked good things in reality better than good things in stories, because at the end of the day you are still entrapped in reality. And though you can escape for a little while, reality is the world you must return to….

TBC---lol

**Okay...I really wanted to update so I kind of rushed on this chapter. Some people have been telling me to update this story next, so I did. This song was a song that I wrote a long time ago but with a little more added to make it go with the story. Hopefully you like it...it's a lot quicker paced than the other songs. With all seriousness I got the inspiration for this song from Panic! At the Disco one day, so I used a cord or two from one of their songs lol...well hopefully you all liked that chapter...**


	15. UPDATE

Hey Guys! HP here. I wanted to let you all know that this week is the week of updates. Due to the kiss between Zack and Maddie on Suite Life on Deck..by the way (On a Cruise…did I call it? LMAO) Ok no, but seriously this week I'll be updating ALL stories.

Also, to let you guys know. Open Mic Night (this story) Will be replaced with a chapter later on today. I'm working on it right now, actually. Hope you guys enjoy the updates. Later guys, I hope you guys are still interested after this long absence.. Later

If anyone wants to get in touch with me you can PM me and ask me for my email. Here's other contact info.

Youtube- AceTicTac18 or hpsurfer16

Twitter- hpboom

Chatango: hpboom

BlogTV- hpboom (see a pattern? Lmao)

Skype- hp-matthews

Myspace- .com/cheetos_make_me_happy

Just hit me up if you want to know what's in store, or if you have any comments and concerns. Or if you just want to talk. Hit me up.

Peace guys


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